I think the shock has finally settled down that it is 2019. I love the idea of planning, especially when it comes to the new year. I also love reflecting. I know what is always helpful for me is to focus on the positive accomplishments and not let the negative things weigh me down or discourage me.
2018 brought so much change for me. I went into the year engaged and super excited for my upcoming nuptials. Honestly, I think 2018 was my most memorable and exciting year ever. January through March definitely taught me how to love AJ deeper and how to keep my eyes focused on the mission.
2018 was so good for my faith and spiritual life. I was able to read three full Christian books (which is rare because I am not a reader!) Honestly, I feel like reading has helped me fall more in love with reflecting on my heart and also being used to thinking about my relationship with God more in-depth. I was able to ask some of the women and men that have been in my life this past year where they’ve seen me grow and I was so encouraged by some of the reassurance. My favorite quote from one of my best friends was:
“You truly embody the scripture about living life to the full. You’re fun, simple, and always are having a good time in Christ. You make marriage look great and being in the church more appealing.”
*MY HEART* That really made me grateful for the trials I had to endure previous years. They produced a peaceful heart in me this year. A heart that desires genuine adventure. Truly a blessing.
It is almost the second week of 2019 and I’ve seen so many New Year Resolutions and goals and my heart is truly inspired to go after what I want to excel in. Some advice I would give to those who are reading this is: go easy on yourself. Don’t overwhelm your expectations. I know for me I can think of 1,000 negative things about myself that I want to change and in the end, I feel defeated. I have to remind myself that God is my source of strength. God gives me courage, peace, purity, compassion, etc.
My main goal and aspiration for this year is to learn how to SURRENDER. The reason I chose surrender is that I am so bad at ‘giving up my rights’. I want what I want 24/7. When things don’t go my way, I am not happy at all. Especially when they are spiritual and good things that I want. I really want to go after having Hannah’s heart. [1 Samuel 2]
If you read 1 Samuel, you will see that Hannah was barren and painfully wanted a child. She was taunted by another woman that could bear children, felt useless, was bitter, hurt, and broken about her situation. Yet, Hannah prayed to God in her brokenness. She surrendered what she desperately wanted to God. She exalted him even though she felt low. She gave it all to God and honored him.
That is the woman I want to be. A woman willing to look insane praying to God and surrendering all my desires to Christ.
Other goals I have this year are:
Continuing to grow in my husband and I’s web design company.
- Read more books
- Love deeply
- Interact with God every day
- Go to more coffee shops
I’m excited and nervous to see what God does through these goals. I also pray for all those who are really going after the growth this year.